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Things to do, let’s trim that waist!

Posted by Administrator on March 5th, 2004.
Filed under Lists, Silliness.

Step 1: Go grocery shopping.

That’s right — go to the store on a full stomach. This will make all the baked goods, potato chips, and sweets less appealing. Without all that rumbling noise coming from your tummy, it is much easier to shop with your brain, and not with your appetite!

Step 2: Start eating fruit again.

When you hit the grocery store, pick up some fresh fruit. Fresh fruits are loaded with vitamins, nutrients, and anti-oxidants that will help flush from your system all of those “deposits”. Also, fruit will give your immune system a boost so you won’t get sick when everyone else at work is hugging porcelain with a case of the flu.

Step 3: Water, water, and more water.

Water is an essential compound for nearly all body processes. Start to hydrate yourself by drinking at least six 8 ounce glasses of water every day. And don’t be afraid to drink more than that amount. It takes the human body more than a week to completely hydrate, so don’t be surprised if you’re making frequent pit stops. The majority of the water you consume will quickly pass through your system, but you need to keep gulping it down.

Step 4: Eat smaller, more numerous meals.

Your body needs small doses of energy throughout the day. By spacing out meals and eating in smaller portions, you will find that it’s easy to eat less in the long run. And your body will have a much easier time digesting food when you supply it in smaller amounts.

Step 5: Eat hot food.

Your stomach can metabolize foods better when they are heated up. By warming up your small and more numerous meals, you can give your digestive system a natural kick-start, thus increasing your energy output and calorie burning.

Step 6: Do not snack before bed.

There are a number of weight-loss diet pills out there right now that claim to help you lose the fat, while allowing you to still eat what you want. What many people don’t notice about these dietary products is that they want you to stop eating three to four hours before bed. The fact is, if we all stopped eating that long before bedtime, almost all of us would lose weight. When we hit the hay, our metabolism slows down, resulting in slower digestion of food. Our stomach breaks down any carbohydrates we have consumed into simple sugars. These sugars sit until they are burned for energy. But since you don’t need as much energy when you sleep, the sugars are stored in a different form — as fats. So the bottom line is, no eating in bed!

Step 7: Get plenty of exercise.

You were hoping I wouldn’t put this one on the list, weren’t you? You’ve heard it a million times, and you’ll hear it once more: Weight loss only works with a combination of diet and exercise. Sure, you can cut out all carbohydrates and starve yourself into losing weight. However, by doing that, you’ll probably lose as much muscle as you will lose fat (and you need all the muscle you can get, you “girly man”). I don’t recommend cutting out carbohydrates (breads, cereals, etc.), but I do recommend cutting back on them — and starting an exercise program. Thirty minutes a day will suffice if you want to keep your bubble gum figure, but if you want to work on your physique and trim those “love-handles”, an hour of intense exercise is better. And don’t be afraid to hit the weights. By increasing muscle mass, you’ll be able to handle cardiovascular activities better, in addition to burning more calories — even at rest. People with higher proportions of lean muscle tissue have more energy and higher metabolisms than persons of equal weight who have less muscle.

Step 8: Pray every day.

What does prayer have to do with losing weight? Nothing — not directly anyway. What prayer does is allow us to open our hearts to God, and put ourselves in his hands. By asking the Lord for help in achieving your goals, you stand a much better chance of actually sticking to them. When your about to shove that Twinkie in your mouth, that prayer for strength of will may help you stop short. Or when you’re about to watc
h a rerun of ER, that prayer for perseverance may just get you off the couch and onto the treadmill. I seriously doubt that God will just melt the pounds off you, but why not ask for His help? As Christians we know that we are supposed to take care of ourselves, in both soul and body. So why not make the Lord a part of your weight loss program? I’d pick God over Richard Simmons any day!

And that’s all there is to it. No fancy calorie counters. No pricey fad diets or expensive fat-burning wonder drugs. Just eight simple steps to a slimmer, healthier you. Of course, you notice I didn’t say “easy steps”. I said “simple”. Following these guidelines may not be all that easy. But if you make sure to hit number eight every day, the rest will fall in line.



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